A Semblance Of Sanity w/ Semi-Starvation Insomnia (hamsterhuey) wrote in vilevenom,
A Semblance Of Sanity w/ Semi-Starvation Insomnia
hamsterhuey
vilevenom

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Here i am at work... (cross-posted as an after thought)

I'm not actually working though.... don't click your tongue, i have no work to do.... i've done what i can and Linda is no where to be found.... so rather than sift through the pages of calculus i waste my time sifting through pages of LiveJournal.... looking through my friends page and scouring various journals who may more may not know i have access to them.... i find that i'm not alone in my misery.... the flavor of the pathetic moans may be different but they still leave the same depressing aftertaste.... and i begin to wonder, does life really suck that much? or is it simply some demented twist of the journals? some cosmic practical joke on those of us LJ freaks.... i'm inclined to believe that life just sucks that hard.... a sprinkle of happy one line posts are lost in the waves of miserable page long rants.... not literal pages mind you, very few of us even have the will to write that much about our pains.... and against such misery, those few people that are genuinely happy hide within the folds of paranoia.... countless private posts (don't ask, you don't want to know) with uplifting and joyful thoughts are hidden from sight.... some un-rational fear keeps those posts hidden, as if to say there is some malignant force just waiting to pounce upon the happy folk and turn them to the dark side.... i'd envision some dark helmeted man speaking through a voice box calling to them.... "come. join us. taste the power of the dark side." that vision is always interrupted as the dark man goes on to tell me how he is my father.... sitting nearby- two of my data managers are deeply involved in a discussion of caramel, but i instead find myself grasping for the bloody stump where my hand should be.... expecting any moment for a furry little ewok to come in and bite my ankle... i'm not entirely sure why that would happen, but i've always thought they deserved sharp teeth.... it isn't as if they have much else going for them.... not particularly strong... or smart... or agile.... sharp little teeth would definitely have benefited them.... gnawing at the armor plated greave of a storm trooper, only to be struck down by a falling potted petunia.... i actually did want an ewok when i was a child.... never have had anything but cats though... and goldfish.... so very many goldfish.... parents, don't ever buy your children goldfish.... those small little yellow bastards are a sinkhole for time, love, and money.... with an average life span of three days we went through fish by the school.... perhaps i was doing something wrong.... too much food? or too little? i was better off feeding them to my snake.... anyone else remember my snake? she was a stupid little reptile.... half of the fish would end up dead beside the water.... who prefers rotting food over fresh? flopping limply on the rocks and mulch, gasping for oxygen rich water.... must have been a pathetic existence.... several days in a pet shop fish tank, followed by a car trip in the hands of an odd red haired thing that kept trying to talk to them... naming them odd sorts of names and then moaning over their impending death.... death.... the fish are too stupid to fear it and i find myself too apathetic.... i guess were it advertised as an excruciatingly long and painful death i might find myself a bit worried.... but i generally see myself dying in the most unlikely of ways.... i'm not sure what that is, but it will be abrupt, loud, and very very public.... and i think i'll die naked.... which makes for an interesting contrast with the loud and public bit.... and i would hope to die last.... i guess it doesn't really matter so much after the fact, i'd be a bit too busy being dead to care.... but some amount of altruistic foresight makes dying before my loved ones seem off.... spontaneous combustion is overrated.... i think i'd rather spontaneous implode.... life ending with a sucking hollow pop strikes me as humorous.... perhaps not as funny as being struck dead by a falling potted petunia, but fairly close.... i'd end up standing before the pearly gates with bits of dirt in my hair only to find out the that i was wrong about that whole religion thing.... i'd probably be comforted in the fact that no one else got it right either.... one of those population signs would be hung next to the gate....

Heaven:
Population: 3
4 when George Lucas dies


the fat man and three pimpled overweight star wars nerds sitting around playing hearts with a small furry critter with sharp pointy teeth.... I'll be waiting just inside the entrance of hell to laugh at Buchannan when he shows up....

"Ha ha. God is an Ewok."
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