That's right... (skaloop) wrote in vilevenom,
That's right...

As a Canadian, I am about to go off on the litigious-happy culture of the United States. Please, don’t take it personally. I like some of you.

An American man is suing AT&T Mobile. The outline of his case is this:

He purchased an AT&T Mobile phone for his son (who, I believe, is nine years old). His son, however, did not receive any calls on his spiffy new phone, because he did not realize that he had to tell people his phone number in order for them to be able to call. The father is blaming this on AT&T because in the instruction booklet that came with the phone, there is no mention of the requirement to distribute your phone number in order to receive calls.

The father is suing for damages because he believes that his son has suffered depression because of the lack of calls. He also claims that the lack of calls has pushed his son towards becoming a homosexual. So he’s suing.

First of all, if this kid is too fucking dumb to know how to work a phone, he’s probably not going to be getting many calls anyway. Even if he did, he’d probably be too busy hunting the neighbourhood cats and lighting their tails on fire.

Secondly, maybe the father should have taken some fucking initiative and taught his son how things work in this technological age. He wouldn’t have to explain exactly how waves carry information to and from the phone, but he could at least mention that people need to know which buttons to press in order to make a phone call.

Thirdly, how the fuck does the lack of phone calls turn someone gay?

Finally, there’s the depression. Sure, not getting phone calls can be a blow to the ego, but I bet a bigger blow comes from a fuckass father who goes public with your stupidity.

This whole lawsuit is a joke, on par with the”McDonald’s coffee is too hot” and “Clitoris rhymes with Dolores” of yesteryear.
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